Jim Fights a Polar Bear

During my trip up North I had a chance encounter with a polar bear. I was walking down the street, I turned around and there he was. This particular bear looked to be about 12 feet tall and 1500-2000 pounds. I remember watching Animal Planet and hearing what to do in case of a bear attack. They claim you should stand up to a black bear, calmly talk while slowly backing away from a Grizzly bear, and pray if you are near a polar bear.

I saw the bear and he opened his mouth and stood up on his hind legs. I stood on mine and growled at him. Interestingly enough his expression did not change. I then ran at the bear and started hitting him in his abdomen. I never realized how strong a polar bear was as he took my best shots and didnt move a muscle. I even tried kicking him, but he still did not go down. See anything wrong with this story? You should.

First of all, the line about walking down the street and seeing a polar bear should have tipped you off. Polar bears live North of the Arctic circle where there are no roads to walk down. Second of all, how did i fight a po.ar bear if polar bears were not in the area where i was? Simple. I fought a stuffed polar bear. The polar bear was real. He was shot in 1975 and had he not been attached to the wall, i would have knocked him down. As it were, the people who were taking care of the bear were not thrilled at me fighting him, but they said that many people do that.

So there you go, Jim fights a polar bear.